Category Archives: Reflection

Moved- Again!

We are officially moved! I have moved more times in the past year then I have ever wanted to move! Hopefully we wont have to move again. At least not for 10 years (let the kiddos finish school and what not). We finally found an acreage to rent out here. So as soon as we got back from our trip it was time to start packing! The move went really smooth. We had a ton of people come help us so that helped. We have gotten a lot unpacked but still have a lot to do. When I should be unpacking I am out taking pictures! Here are some I have taken:

Sunset through the trees

This is one of the old buildings on the land. And Yes it has an old Texaco sign painted on it

Jen coming out into the field with me. A little country girl already!

Sun setting into the corn

The kids found this swing! 

Mama Flicker feeding her baby 

We are all loving it here. My son is loving the trees to explore. My daughter can not wait to get our horses here (end of August) and my dog is chasing rabbits till her little heart is content (she sleeps very well at night now lol). I am loving all the scenery for photo taking and hubby is just happy to be where he belongs- in the country!  This summer has been amazing between our trip, the move and now I have landed a full time job at the school! God is truly blessing us and I am forever grateful!

The Little Surprises

As a mom nothing should surprise me. But once in a while my kids manage to in the most unexpected ways. I love watching them grow and turn into these beautiful, caring, kids. I normally talk about my daughter but today I wanted to tell you about my son.

My son normally has anxiety issues. The slightest change and he just melts down and it something we deal with and he is getting better at controling and talking things through. But with that comes an amazing photographic memory as well. You can take him some place and he will be able to tell you exactly where to go even days or weeks later to get to where you need to be. For example- when we moved. He was afraid our family couldn’t find us. We took him to our new town, let him meet his teacher. A few days later we were visiting with my mom. He told her what all she needed to pass to get to our new house. We were just in aw.  Since moving though- he is more calm, his anxiety attacks are less and less. He just is over all more happy.

But that isn’t the only transformation. He has had a spiritual one as well. He has chosen to be baptized and fully understood what that met. He has joined boy scouts and is all about helping other’s now. This winter we had a blizzard and our neighbor was out of town. Our son spent 2 days clearing our neighbors drive way so he could get into it when he returned.

Fast forward to this summer and out of the blue he started holding doors open for ladies. He even makes his sister and I wait to get out of the car so he can open the doors for us. But my proudest moments have been the past few weeks.

Memorial Day- we had a tornado hit a town south of us. The next day we got a call from church asking to come help clean up… My husband and I talked about it but wondered what our small kids could do. In walks in my son “Mommy I want to go help the people, can we please?” We tried to tell him that there really wasn’t much he could do. But he insisted. We wanted to embrace his concern so we took him. He was quiet the trooper. Both the kids were. They were dragging tree limbs that they could to the piles, picking up the small branches. They were doing a great job. I was so proud of them.

The biggest surprise and proud moment was tonight. We were watching the Blind Side. You know that movie about Michael Oher, the football player. Half way through the movie my son informed me that this is his favorite movie. I asked him way (thinking he would say because it was about football) but no. It was much deeper. He informed me because they helped Micheal get out of the rain and because the lady took care of him like a Mommy is suppose to do. Yes- that came out of my soon to be 8 year olds mouth. He fully understood that movie and to know that he would want to help a kid to if we found them just made my heart happy. He could of been thinking of our trip, he could of been more concern about the football, but no it was a geniune concern for Michael. He loves that story because someone helped him and was a “mommy to him”.

All this just reminds me that my little man is growing up. I am so happy with the path he is choosing to take. I only pray that God continues to guide him down this path. If it is His will I can see God leading Danny to be just like his Daddy- in Law Enforcement, where he can help people on a daily basis. The little things make me smile and I couldn’t be prouder of my Little Man.

Where has time gone!

So last night while I was debating stayin up late for my hubby or going to bed it dawned on me. It has been a year since we started our new chapter in life. Sorry guys no fancy pictures just pure reflection.

At the end of April last year was the proudest moment a wife could have- her husband having his badge pinned on him. Watching him take that oath to serve and protect and since that day our lives have never been the same.

There is no more normal for us. Our Friday is on Monday, our Monday on Thursday. Birthdays are scheduled around sleep and shifts. There has been training and court like no other. There are nights  where he isn’t home till 6am the next morning and nights where he is home by bedtime. Our life has been everything but normal! I would not change it for the world!

Since moving to our tiny community we have made new friends, found a great church and have really embraced the small town life. I figured if everyone is going to know me it was going to be by actually seeing me and talking to me and not through rumors. I now work at the school part time as a para sub and hope to be full time next fall. Nothing like working around your kid’s schedule then having the exact same one as them! We have gotten my son into Cub Scouts which I have helped out with a lot. Then there is the wrestling, the track and soon T-Ball. We are really making waves in the community. My favorite thing is when I meet someone (yes there are still a few out there) I simply have to say “We are the new trooper family” and they know everything. They know where we live, they know what shift my hubby works, what grade my kids are in and even of our food allergy. And oddly enough, I love it! I would not trade it for the world!

Yes we have had some interesting not so fun times. My hubby’s agency has been a part of a few shoot outs/hostage situations. Luckily he was off for all of them. He did wreck is car already in a chase as well (he was fine). But the biggest frustration has been getting family to understand that we can’t just drop everything and drive 2 hours for a 2 hour thing to drive 2 hours back every weekend! We have a life that we have to make of our own, we try to go visit as much as we can, but our life needs to be instilled in our new community. I think if we can get family to understand that and not expect us to drive to them every month I would be good.

The other thing I have been dealing with this year is learning to let go. I have a few people/incidents in my life that I just need to let go. One of them I was reminded of when I went to start writing this post as it involves my hubby’s graduation from the Police Academy. I even remember the hurt in my daughters eyes at one point over something that happened during the event. But I am working on letting go of that. It is hard but I will turn it over to God along with the other person I am having issues with.

Over all I am very happy with all that has gone on. We have really made a life for ourselves here and my kids are extremely happy. My son’s night terrors have stopped for the most part (in fact has only had one massive one since we moved!), my daughter has really grown and I am often told they can not believe how compassionate she is for her age (we have a kid in her class with Down Syndrom and she is the only one who is truly nice to him). I am so proud of our family for the adaptions we made and for adjusting so well. It definately has been an adventure and I can not wait to see what is in store for us!

April Ice Storm 2013

Yep that is right. It is the middle of April and we have had an ice storm. We lost power for a bit last night but luckily came back on before it got to cold in the house. So what does one do in the Spring when there is ice everywhere— Take Pictures!!!!!!!!!

My hubby bought me a new Canon T4i and I have been using it every chance I get. These are just a few of the photos I took. The ice was so thick we could not open our car door, I still have yet to open my mailbox and the grass crumbles at your feet.

Fresh Green Grass now cover in 1/2 inch of ice

The poor buds on this trea are now little balls of ice

our fence gives a good idea of what is covering our cars and everything else
Our front tree
Our neighbors garage

Last night we had Hail mix with sleet- you can still see the tiny balls that fell during the odd storm system

~The above photos were taken by Gluten Free for Jen. They may not be used for any reason with out the writen consent of the admin. Questions may be sent to glutenfreeforjen at gmail dot com.~

Over this Week!

I wish I had some cute picture of my kiddos I could share with you but this week has been a very stressful week.

For the first time I let my hubby’s job get the best of me. My mind is just in a million different areas of anger and fear and I just can not focus. I know I have promised some giveaways and I do have 2 I hope to get posted tomorrow. But right now- my mind is on him.

It started Thursday morning- I got a text while I was working telling me he missed out on a shoot out/car chase Wednesday night. I thought gee darn and went on with my life. Hubby went into work early for some training and I took my son to cub scouts. Having their Daddy home for 10 days and then him going back to work took a toll on them. They were chaotic! But alas bed time came and went and hubby got home. That is where my break down started.

The chase Wednesday night involved one of my hubby’s friends. He is around the same age as us, married with kiddos the same age as ours. Well- the jerk (sorry I have no other name to call him) decided running from them was not enough- so he shot at them! My hubby’s friend’s cruiser was hit 5 times, once through the windshield and lodged in the dash board just in front of the steering wheel! Then a second Trooper had his car hit 3 times by bullets- one of the bullets again, went through the windshield and landed in a pillar that is in between the driver seat and the passenger seat. Needless to say- both those brave men were being watched and were really Blessed that night! They are shaken up, especially the younger of the two (my hubby’s friend) but will be ok. But that was not all- while my hubby was working Thursday night- he was sent to a certain area because of a chase in a neighboring state that was coming into our state. Luckily the other state was able to stop the idiot before he crossed the state line otherwise- hubby would of been dealing with that.

Hearing all of that just hit me. If my hubby would of been on duty on Wednesday he would of been at the shooting one. Then he almost got involved in a chase. I thought- what would I do if I needed to rush off to a hospital. We live 2 hours from our family, who would I call to watch my kiddos until family got here, or would they take my kids to the hospital with me. What would happen? I find myself hoping to never find out!

As if all of that was not enough excitement, my hubby got into his car tonight- got an alert- another chase- be on alert in case it came this way, blah blah blah. Seriously? Wasn’t 2 a few days prior enough? When will this madness stop? The thing that irritated me the most- is the first jerk (the one who shot at cops) was just RELEASED for a prior felony! Oh and he was wanted for murder- they had let him go on bond and he didn’t show for his arraignment on Wednesday (go figure because Criminals care about laws right?). We need harsher punishments for guys like these. This guy shot at people and all he is being charged with is attempted second degree murder? What about first degree murder?

Don’t get me wrong- I am proud of my hubby for doing what he does. I will continue to support him and be here for him. But right now- with all the madness in the world- I am concerned for him. I pray for him every night and I pray for all the men and women in blue.

So if I seem to be MIA- this is why. We have dealt with a lot and I am just over it. I am ready for this week to be done. I am ready for a new week and to get back on track. If I could just clear my thoughts of all that has happened I would be good to go! But stuff like this weighs on you. I now have a list of people I feel I could call if the need a raises. Lets hope and pray I don’t ever need to use it!

Scary Yet Interesting Facts

Ok I am honestly sick of hearing about all this talk about guns being a problem and we need more gun control. Let’s forget that you already have to go through background checks, waiting periods and so much more in order to get a weapon. In most states in order to conceal carry you even have to take a COURSE!

So lets look at some real problems-

First- we as a country have desensitized our children to violence  Look at the shows that are on TV, the movies that come out, the video games they play. You sit there and say “not my child” but are you with him/her every second of their life? What ever happened to our kids being kids, going outside and playing. There was even recently a case where a kid admitted he killed his sister and mother because he saw how easy Mike Meyers did it in the Rob Zombie remake of Halloween. He wondered if he would be able to do it with ease and be at peace with it like the movie showed…

Second- drugs. Would some of the people who do these things do them if they were not on them? There were a Total of 12,664 (8500 caused by guns and then other means are listed) murders in 2011 according to one FBI Database of those 390 occured during a Drug related felony offence. Then if you look at the CDC there were a total of 40,239 drug induced deaths. That is is way higher then the homicide by firearm rate of 11,101 deaths. Did you know that as many as 230 cities here in the US have Mexican drug cartel operating in them? Let me put it this way- on 2/29/12 the Border Patrol seized $5.55 Million in Meth. That was just one incident that one day. On Jan 17 of 2012 they reported that one of their ports seized over $17 million worth of marijuana in a two month time frame. Imagine how much more they seize on a daily basis and at other ports!

Third- Alcohol. Yes, Alcohol. Did you know that you are more likely to die from an alcohol related incident then you are then by a gun. In 2011 there were 26,256 alcohol induced deaths and there were 34,677 auto accident related deaths (again higher then the homicide by firearm rate of 11,101 deaths).  The year prior,  the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration reported that 32,885 people died in a traffic crashes in 2010. Of those 32K deaths 10,228 were people who died in drunk driving incidents (accounting for 31% of all traffic deaths). It also starts with our kids. Just last night my husband had to drive a kid home because he was underage and drinking. This was the kid’s 2nd MIP in the past 3 months.. New Years eve a party was broken up and resulted in 13+ MIP’s a majority of them were high school basketball players who now can not play for a majority of the season. How many scholarships just went down the drain because a recruit will not be able to see that kid play? Talk to your kids, is alcohol really worth it?

Last- Harsher punishments. Did you know that 70% of the people that commit crimes that involve weapons are repeat offenders? Yep. Then we also have judges like the one who gave a St. Louis man a 4 year prison sentance for open firing on a police station! Yes- 4 years- the incident happend in 2010 and he was just sentanced. So figured 2 years time served plus any good behavior laws, this man will probably be back out on the streets by the end of the year if he isn’t already. What does that tell would be criminals? It tells them you can openly shoot in a crowded place and not get in trouble for it! Or in Nebraska when a judge sentenced a child sex offender to probation because of his size! She openly admitted he was only getting probation because of how short he was- she was afraid he would be hurt in prison… My thought- TO BAD! He shouldn’t of raped a child to begin with! That judge was voted out very quickly!

My question is this: When have we as a country, sat our morals aside for the sake of entertainment. A person would rather go out and risk killing someone for a few drinks then have a good time with out a beer. Drugs are coming across our borders every day and getting into the hands of our children . Yet we are so focused on gun control right now. We need to stop being friends to our kids and being parents. We need to be involved, we need to quit being afraid of law enforcement. Everything above are the type of things my husband deals with on a daily basis and yet no one is on TV promoting for stricter drug laws and alcohol laws or harsher punishments. I think we need to come together and focus on some of the real problems this country has instead of sticking our heads in the sand and waiting for our government to do something. Those gun laws are only going to affect law abiding citizens. They will not stop criminals who do not care. If they cared about the laws in the first place they would not be criminals, we would not have accidents caused by drunk driving, and we would not have the drug problems this country has.

FBI Crime in the US Murder Circumstance chart
The Century Council
CDC National Vital Records
U.S Customs and Border Protection
KMOX St. Louis News 
North Platte News

Winter Break!

Winter break started early for my kiddos by a blizzard moving through the area last Wednesday. We had about 9 inches of snow and of course our drifts are much bigger! I have been jealous of my hubby because he has been home playing with them in the snow while I have been stuck working!

Since we do not know where the good sledding hills are my kids have made their own! The use the pile that the tractor created when clearing out drive as a small hill to go down!

It can be hard to get a picture of my son so when he paused I was all over it! He can be such a cutie at times! Although must of the time he is an ornery little turkey like his Daddy!

Leave it to Jen to pause and pose for me! She is my little ham and loves getting her picture taken!

Of course no one is having more fun then our husky! She is loving this! We will throw a snow ball up and she will jump up and catch it. This is a big clump that she caught and is gladly attacking it. You would think it was a bone or something!

My 3rd kid! She is trying to convince my kiddos to come and get her! I love playing out in the snow with my kiddos. I love getting pictures of them and capturing those moments. If only I had a better camera to do it with! Capturing moments like these are a reminder of how blessed I am to be where we are at and to have the wonderful family I have!

So I may be MIA over the next few weeks with winter break, Christmas, New Years and my daughters birthday. I hope you and your family have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! I look forward to the year to come and getting to know you guys even more!

Day Dreaming

The past few days have had me day dreaming with this really nice weather. I find myself sitting on my back deck just thinking and dreaming. I take myself away to a place that feels like home. I imagine myself with these nice crisp mornings and nights, sitting on a wrap around porch (so I can watch the sun rise and the sun set) with a cup of tea and maybe a good book. Or during the day sitting their cross stitching while the kids play.

I can imagine the fresh country air, nothing but the sounds of the birds and the wind dancing in the trees. The smell of lilacs and roses (I love roses as they remind me of the ones my grandma grew right by their front door). I can imagine curling up on the swing with the hubby just taking in the stars. I used to imgane this place near the mountains but now I can just imagine it where ever. The old tradition plantation style house with the huge porch (picture Gone with the wind but smaller).

I would really love to be there one day. I am ok with an old farm house as long as it has a nice porch with a swing. One of our favorite things to do is go to my in laws “farm”. The kids love helping with the chores (getting eggs and feeding the animals), they love seeing their horses and my husband loves riding. Me- I grew up in a city. I used to think I could not do with the silence and the darkness and thought I would go insane on a gravel road. But now I find myself longing for a place like my in laws or like my aunts farm (she has that perfect row of trees leading from the road to her front door). I love to just sit on their porch swing with the gentle breeze and just relaxing.

I know one of these days we will get our perfect home and be able to have our horses with us. My kids will be able to run around with out many limits. Until that time I will keep dreaming and praying.

Is there one day dream/dream you find yourself longing for?

A New Me- Week 1 pt 2

My joys-  riding their bikes in our garage 🙂

Welcome to pt 2 of my thoughts for today as promised in the early pt 1 post. I have been battling a lot with some inner issues. Mainly trying to figure out how to do everything, and how to forgive and just let petty things go, also being more positive.

My thoughts on this really started back when I did my I am a Mom post. This week really was not any better. More stress then anything else. Dishwasher still not working, minor and material thing I know but still frustrating when trying to sell your house.Which brings me to the next thing- trying to get my house ready to sell. These agents want this perfectly clean- model home type appearance. Hello, I have 2 kids and a dog and it is just me- it IS NEVER going to look like that picture perfect model home. Then there is the taxes, finances, truck acting up, phones aren’t working, and then not knowing where we are going to move. That is the biggest one. I hate not knowing what type of community I am going to be moving to. What are the people like, will the accept us, will my kids adjust ok. So many exciting yet scary thoughts going through my mind it is overwhelming. And to be dealing with all this by myself- hubby not around no one to talk to at night about it.  Or is there?

Through out the past few weeks I kept seeing the same things being posted. It all started over at My Freshly Brewed Life with her post about how life is an adventure and God is in control. Then I noticed the devotionals from Our Daily Bread had the same theme going.

Ok, ok I get it- So I start reading Psalms. I started at the beginning and noticed a lot of it as a- asking for forgiveness b- asking for protection and c- asking for help and most of all- Giving thanks…. Then I get to Psalms 13:5-6  “But I have trusted in Your Mercy; My heart shall rejoice in Your Salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me”…. Have I trusted in him? Am I giving Him enough Praise?  Another verse that has jumped out at me is Psalms 18:2-3 “The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; My God, my strength, in whom I will trust; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I will call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised; So shall I be saved from my enemies.”

Then Our Daily Bread‘s devotion for today was about handing your cares over to Him, which I read right after reading My Freshly Brewed Life’s post about Trusting in Him.

Wow….since reading that I realized what I have been missing. I mean we all pray but do we really mean it? Do you really trust that God will help you?

To be honest I am new at this. I was just baptized last spring and I have always told my husband we just have to pray about it and He has not let us fail yet. I admit that I do not know everything and I may be off on what these verses are meaning. But I am always told there is no translating the Bible. It is what it is. There are times were I feel as if I am taking on more then I can handle. I feel frustrated, I feel alone, I feel almost lost at times. But that is because I am not giving it all over to Him. That is part of my inner battle. I need to hand things over to God more. I need to focus on the good and show my appreciation for what he has given me more often. So that is my other #1 goal. I have always opened my heart to Him but I feel as if it hasn’t been enough. Also to not be so bitter about some other situations that are going on in my life right now. I need to just let things go. I need to fight these battles and trust in Him more!

Monday Thoughts

This week has started out amazing! My little girl had to stay home from preschool today (that is the only bad thing- no mom likes seeing a child sick), but by noon she was back to her cheerful self! We sat outside on the deck for about 30 minutes reading books. I really miss this weather! It reached 71 here today! For those that don’t know Nebraska our winters are usually full of snow, and bitter cold. We have had an unseasonably warm winter this year with maybe a total of 5-7 inch (which normally we get that with 1 snowfall!).

We got home from getting my little man from school and played outside for the rest of the evening. It was so nice that I just had to grill! Come summer time you will notice pretty much all my cooking is done on the grill!

Dinner of Pineapple Brats, Ranch Pasta Salad and Bush’s Grillin Beans

As the sun was beginning to set I went to close up the house (it is starting to cool off) and notice a familiar smell. That beautiful smell of wood burning (yes I know I am odd). It made me long for a camping trip and more so, a reenactment (my family does civil war reenacting). How I miss the smell of cooking over an open fire with my cast iron, the smell of gun powder in the air, enjoying the company of friends around the fire pit laughing while sipping on hot cocoa on the crisp nights. Walking around in a big ol’ skirt and having gentleman treat me like a lady, tipping their hats as I walk by, giving up their seats for me- you know- the old fashion way that has been long lost. I have come to meet many wonderful people from all over the country. It is a hobby I would not give up for the world and a hobby that brought my husband and I together (my knight literally came riding into my life- I will share at a later date). Although the smell of the fire pit down the street brought sadness. With my husband’s new job it may be a year or two before we can go out to an event again 🙁

So as we come to a close tonight I am sitting here sipping on a cup of chai tea. Thinking of everything this week, this month (we find out where we are to relocate to), and even this year has to offer us. Hoping to at least do a camping trip with my family, but thankful for everything that has been brought to us. I also plan to start a journey of reading through the book of Psalms. I have been seeing so many verses from there I want to know more. I may share a thought or two on them as well when the moment moves me.