We all have days were we just want to throw in the towel and surrender. One thing goes wrong after another, kids running a muck, well you get the picture. Just a day where right away you know- it is going to be one of those days and want to crawl back into bed.
Let me start with late last night. I was getting ready to go up to bed, severely missing my husband and cant wait to see him tonight. All of a sudden I hear a beeping coming from my dishwasher. It quits on me in the middle of a wash cycle and starts beeping. After a phone call to my brother I flip the breaker and go to bed. Fast forward to this morning, turn breaker on still not working. I have a real estate agent coming today to put our house on the market and now I have to hand wash all of my dishes. Then there are still the bathrooms and the laundry and sweeping/mopping the floor and having to vacuum again (my dog is shedding her winter coat already). All in the matter of 6 hours (yet here am I on here typing up my thoughts). Then on the way to take the kids to school the breaks on my truck made me slid a little (it was almost as if I hit ice but the roads are dry) and the ABS light came on— I surrender!
But then I remembered reading something yesterday on My Freshly Brewed Life about adventure and how life is filled with uncertainty. How you may know where you are going but there will be obstacles that wont always be easy. It made me think- I can either A- be frustrated and surrender or B- attack those head on. I always told my husband that God will not let us fall completely. But now I find myself doubting. Yesterday and today was the reminder I needed. That God is always here for us. He will help me through this. I may not be able to see His plan but I can trust he has one. I always try to follow Philippians 4:8 which pretty much says to focus on the good. Yesterdays reminder came in the form of Psalms 63:8 (which was posted on My Freshly Brewed Life) “My soul followeth hard after thee:thy right hand upholdeth me”. hmmm… I seem to be seeing a trend because my sister in law posted something similar on her site For Him and My Family, maybe He is trying to tell me something. I think when I get in one of my I surrender moods I will just open up Psalm 68 and read the whole thing.
So with my head held high and God by my side I will attack to day with everything I got. I am, after all, a mom and that is what we do right?
Today my husband and I watched a really good movie, Courageous. It is about some Sheriff Deputies who are not only finding their way with their families but with God as well. It really tugs at your heart (so ladies have Kleenex ready!) and really opens your mind.
This movie was amazing! It features 4 deputies and 1 civilian who come together over fatherhood. First, there is the dad who is divorced and sees his son every other weekend, then the dad who one would say is over protective of his daughter (I see my husband being that way when my daughter is dating age), the dad who isn’t in his child’s life at all, the dad who is doing everything he can to provide for his family, and the dad who makes the story- the one who thinks he is doing enough. Together these men come together and find God and make a vow to be Godly Fathers.
I am sure we all can sit back and relate to one of these types of parents. Heck I can relate to a few of them to be honest. I know this movie is from a dad’s perspective but it really made me think- how am I as a Mom. How often do we take for granted the time we have with our kids. Today it is easy to find parents who are more concerned with being a friend, or just not being involved and sending them off to play while they hide behind phones and computers. Seeing that and seeing the movie made me grateful for my parents. They disciplined me when needed , knew all my friends (and their parents) and set house rules that were to be followed till the day I moved out. Their marriage showed me how to love and their relationship with us kids taught me how to be open. I don’t think I would be where I am today with out them.
The movie also made me think if I am doing enough as a Mom. I try to spend a little time each day one on one with my kids. I email my son’s teacher to “check in” and see if his days are going as good as he says. I talk with my daughter’s teacher every morning before dropping her off. I try to feed them healthy foods, and feed their souls with the same morals my parents taught me. I know I could probably not use my phone to check emails or check in on facebook as much, I already do not work on this blog unless they are in bed or at school. What examples am I setting for my kids also run into my mind. Am I teaching them to be honoring to their father and to God. Am I teaching them to love and to be kind to each other?
Going forward I am going to try harder. I am going to try teaching them to be positive more, to look to God during a time of need. I am going to try to not swear, to not talk badly of others, to not call names when I am made. I am going to try to be more calm and level head. I am going to follow the ending of Joshua 24:15 “But as for me and my house, we will serve the lord”
I am truly blessed to have had been raised by 2 people who loved me unconditionally and who have been there as much as they are. I can only hope that I can be as good of a parent as my parents were.
Aaahhhhhhhh… Bedtime…. Let the silence begin! (ok in our house partial silence due to a football game)
Their bedtime for me is a chance to sit down and relax with a nice cup of tea and maybe a good book or watch a good movie or my favorite TV show. There is just something about sipping on some Chai tea or some Green Tea with honey that just makes me relax. I have even been known to drink a little tea during the summer! It gives me a chance to reflect on the day. The things I have done and what I would like to do better.
Tonight I can’t help but to think of a video I was asked to watch. This video was amazing and touched me deeply. I will share it below (it is about 10 minutes but worth it)
The pictures in this are just amazing. I hope that some day I can be just as good of a photographer. But ever since watching this I try to find moments. Moments of blessings, moments of things I should be grateful for. I often find that most of those moments involve my kids. Like my son giggling because he loves how the shower makes the water fall on him (we started making him take showers on his own). Or my daughter and her contagious laugh because you gave her a goofy look. There are moments with my husband like when I am cooking and he walks up behind me and gives me a hug. There is so much to be grateful for but it can be easy to look past them.
I have always had an attitude of “who cares”. But it isn’t because I don’t care it is because I know it is out of my control. I try to find the positive side of things and try to teach my kids to be positive and never give up. I use my husband as an example. He was told by agency after agency that because of his eye he could not be hired into Law Enforcement. Then it happened. One local Law Enforcement agency is giving him a chance. If he had given up we would still be in the unpredictable construction field. That is something to be proud of and grateful for.
So grab a cup of tea and join me, I highly recommend Chai tea. As a mom you deserve it and let me know what you are grateful for!